I woke up today with the blahs.
Last night my roommate had his pal over to eat dinner and watch movies.He’d been stressing all day about it to me every hour on the hour and right before the date was 100 percent on-every minute on the minute.And so lucky me I got to take part in the stress,too.
Being an accomodating and concerned type of person I wanted his date at our house to go well and yet at the same time I wished he could just get on with it with out the four alarm anxiety babble!
I wanted to say it’s just another date in a long line of dates why all the fuss? Because he really wants a normal relationship to start right this second and seemingly with anyone. And I understand because I too have been desperate for a normal relationship although not as desperate as that.Seems like(and we have often discussed this) he wants anyone to fill the partner shoes. I felt I was more discriminating than this in the past and I wanted the one I was sleeping with at the time to maybe fill these shoes. Oh whatever.Enough of this pop psychology.
So everything was going fine until my live in boyfriend decided to run off with the dog for a few hours,leaving me alone with the daters. Earlier, I’d rented The Descent and since this was ostensibly a dinner and movie date I offered that we watch this film and not the Family Guy DVDs the date had brought along.And I really really just wanted to watch this movie!
The problem was that A. had run off with Dog for an undetermined amount of time and so wouldn’t be around to watch this movie,too.It seemed like not a problem at the time because I told him we would probably watch it and by running off the way he did I assumed he didn’t care if we did.
Oh no.Not the case.
Granted there were more than what movie to watch tensions going on in our house last night –there was our roommate, a male, dating another male right in the living room and A. bless his heart isn’t as advanced as I am in the “whatever, so there are 2 guys cuddling on the sofa” way of thinking.And our gay roommate is aware that some guys aren’t as into gayness right in the house as other men might be; say, other gay men for example.
I looked at it this way: D. lives with us.D. is gay.D. wants a boyfriend.D. is bound to have men over to the house as is his right within reason as a rent-paying roommate.
A. doesn’t quite see it the same way. He is spoiled by our last roommate,G. who was never home because she was always at her boyfriend’s apartment– making her the ideal roommate: the never home but pays rent kind.
So when A. came home about an hour into the film he was obviously displeased.He and I use the same I Am Not Pleased tactics: we march into our bedroom and sulk.So that is what A. did.
When The Descent was over,I went in there to ask him what was up and he wouldn’t look at me and barely responded to my questions.
I felt put in the middle.
It was understood that for the livingroom portion of the date all were welcome to watch a movie along with the 2 daters(very generous of them,no?).
It was not my fault that A. wasn’t comfortable.It is A.’s problem not mine.
It isn’t my fault that A. chose to take a hike and not watch along with us a movie he knew I’d been dying to see for months. And he knows me: he knew I would probably give in to temptation and watch the movie with or without him. I know I shouldn’t have.
I tried to make it up to him by making a really good dinner but he remained sulky and went right to bed after he’d eaten.And I went in to kiss him goodnight and asked him not to be mad at me and he said let me sleep and tomorrow I won’t be mad at you anymore.
So when he woke me up today before going to work I asked him if he was still mad at me and he said no.But I still have the Blahs.